trying to help, but being held back
since the beginning, my mom and i have worked together to lose weight. we started just over a year ago and i got her up and walking and encouraged her to eat better. every day i say “you ready to go walking?” and we go. but lately she has been slowing me down. we use to walk about 3.5mph but she’s slowing down to 3.0 and i end up walking ahead of her. i want to walk w/ her but i’m not going to walk slowly when i’m capable of walking faster. a few nights a week i just find myself no longer asking her to walk. i want to walk faster and farther & i know that won’t happen if i let her come with me. with that said, she won’t walk unless i tell her to come with me. she’s still about 20# from the goal weight her doctor set for her. but i’m not. i have a long way to go and i’m not going to slow down b/c she is. i want to keep pushing her, but i don’t want her to drag me down. i can only push her so far, she needs to learn to push herself. it use to be so motivating to me to have her to walk with. but now i realize that i can do this on my own and that i’m actually doing better on my own. i guess it’s all good for me, but not for her. she’s not losing as much as me. there use to be about an 80# difference between out weights, now the difference is about 30#. i’m closing the gap quickly. of course that makes me happy. it’s like a competition for me & i would love to eliminate that gap. but i don’t want to see her give up. and certainly don’t want to see her start gaining.
